Friday, June 20, 2014

Let There Be Summer

It's finally here.

Not officially, since according to the calendar, Summer starts tomorrow.

Not by the weather, since it's presently in the 60s and breezy enough to comfortably wear a light jacket.

But it's sunny. It is, for the moment, humidity-free.

And I am officially done with school and, for the time being at least, meetings.

What a crazy year this has been.  I started to write about it a few weeks ago but found myself writing a novel.  A picture-less novel, no less, in 0.0009-point font, and it was still about as long as War and Peace.

There were some wonderful highs and some terrible lows at work, at home, and in general. We made it, of course, and in many ways we're stronger for it.  I think I am going to go back and work some more on that draft, add some photos, split it into a few posts, and upload them sometime soon. Now that it's summer and all, I should have time to do all the things I haven't contemplated since August.

At least, that's my plan. It's starting today with some sewing (okay, okay, so that's really just so I can clear the kitchen table, where my sewing machine has sat since Sunday, but who's counting?!) and will continue with some serious cleaning, packing, and all the laundry in the history of laundry.

In the meantime, some other news:

My former teammate Victoria has accepted a job in Braintree, Massachusetts. I am so excited for her.  She's said all along that all she wanted was to stay in Maine for two years to get some teaching experience and then to move to Boston. She's a few miles short of Boston proper, but she's on her way. She's a new teacher who loves what she does and she is passionate, driven, and quite frankly, pretty darn amazing. I'd be thrilled if CAM or WHM had her as a teacher.  And it's fun, being on the other side of "just starting out," to see her so excited and happy. What's more exhilarating than  plans working out?! She's rightfully on Cloud 9, and part of me is as well. Joy is contagious, and I am thrilled for her.  We've made a lot of wonderful memories in our crazy two years in our dysfunctional amazing workplace, and I count her among my dearest friends.  Victoria is proof that things all happen for a reason.  (And also that God loves redheads!)  We made a great team, and we will continue to make a great team even when she's in Mass and I'm who knows where doing who knows what.

Of course, her move has also made me a bit reflective on where I stand in my own life.  I've had an interesting few weeks at work, and I've been in the dumps more than not. When I wasn't down, I was definitely soul searching -- whether I should apply for department head/content leader (I decided not to); whether I still want to teach (I decided yes, for now); whether the common denominator of unhappiness is me, not crazy schools (I decided yes, perhaps. But I have certainly had my share of craziness); whether I want to stay at my current school (until yesterday, that was the million-dollar question).  Yesterday at end the day -- literally, as I was walking out of the building on the verge of tears -- I found out that my schedule for next year is still not what I wanted or hoped for, but I do at least have a classroom again.  And for that, I am incredibly thankful. Relieved. Happy. I can't quite find the words to say what a burden has been lifted, to feel like "at least I have that."  It's more than an "at least," though. It's huge.  I'm grateful.

In the span of a day I went from crying about what I'll do next year to actually having some of that sense of dread lifted.

Sure, I'm losing my "work BFF," and my other work BFF is moving upstairs to work with freshmen -- which means we more than likely won't see much of each other during the work day.

But I'm not facing hating everything about everything anymore, and a little part of my exhausted self is -- here, on Day One of summer -- thinking about Fall.

Goodness, help me!


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